If your Advent this year has been anything like mine, you have found it difficult to enter the season. Let alone maintain a fruitful Advent Journey. Yes, we are in the Third Week! Coming to its close even! And that Fourth Week, well it is just 24 hours this year! (This post is from 2023, but still relevant)
What has been the struggle in the Advent Journey this year? Busyness. Activities. This rehearsal and that one. This thing needs done and so does that one. It also seems that the world, whether intentionally or not, tries to cram everything it can into the end of the year; even when it seems unnecessary; especially given what should be the focus for this time of year. Added to this of course, there is the hustle and bustle of holiday shopping. The promise of more “Christmas for your money!” and “I love you this many dollars’ worth!” can be hard to resist. Yet, this has not been so much of a challenge for me this year. It really has been just plain busyness; and a sense of what this season is supposed to be about that seemed this year much harder to reconcile with the experiences around me.
Finding myself feeling a bit like Charlie Brown this Advent, I have wrestled with a sense of anxiety and sadness that has been hard to shake. I would not say that I have found myself in a place of desolation, because I believe this time has been one in which the Lord has been doing much work in my heart: my own, “O come, O come, Emmanuel, and ransom captive Israel that mourns in lonely exile here until the Son of God appear.” This seems fitting.
As I was reflecting on this, I realized, I am not alone in this. I have every confidence that some of you reading have felt this same way. That very short Fourth Week of Advent is fast approaching, and you are saying to yourself, “Where did it go?” You may be tempted to discouragement. For this reason, I would like to both invite and encourage you to consider a better way of thinking about this; and I pray that it will be helpful in your journey toward Christmas!
First, I would like invite you to spend some time reflecting on a few passages of Scripture:
Lamentations 3:22-23
The steadfast love of the Lord never ceases, his mercies never come to an end; they are new every morning; great is thy faithfulness.
Matthew 20:1-16
“For the kingdom of heaven is like a householder who went out early in the morning to hire laborers for his vineyard. After agreeing with the laborers for a denarius a day, he sent them into his vineyard. And going out about the third hour he saw others standing idle in the market place; and to them he said, ‘You go into the vineyard too, and whatever is right I will give you.’ So they went. Going out again about the sixth hour and the ninth hour, he did the same. And about the eleventh hour he went out and found others standing; and he said to them, ‘Why do you stand here idle all day?’ They said to him, ‘Because no one has hired us.’ He said to them, ‘You go into the vineyard too.’ And when evening came, the owner of the vineyard said to his steward, ‘Call the laborers and pay them their wages, beginning with the last, up to the first.’ And when those hired about the eleventh hour came, each of them received a denarius. Now when the first came, they thought they would receive more; but each of them also received a denarius. And on receiving it they grumbled at the householder, saying, ‘These last worked only one hour, and you have made them equal to us who have borne the burden of the day and the scorching heat.’ But he replied to one of them, ‘Friend, I am doing you no wrong; did you not agree with me for a denarius? Take what belongs to you and go; I choose to give to this last as I give to you. Am I not allowed to do what I choose with what belongs to me? Or do you begrudge my generosity?’ So the last will be first, and the first last.”
Now, there is a lot happening in this parable of wages of course. It may not be the best use of the Scripture passage, but at the same time, I think there is something valuable that we can take from it considering our discussion so far!
Let me just say plainly, no matter how your Advent has been, it does not matter how you started. It matters how you finish! Has it been hard to embrace the season this year? If your answer is yes, it is important that you not give into despair or lean into discouragement and self-condemnation. The words of St Therese of Lisieux, from a letter to her sister Celine, comes to mind:
“The good God does not need years to accomplish His work of love in a soul; one ray from His Heart can, in an instant, make His flower bloom for eternity…
In times of aridity when I am incapable of praying, of practicing virtue, I seek little opportunities, mere trifles, to give pleasure to Jesus; for instance a smile, a pleasant word when inclined to be silent and to show weariness. If I find no opportunities, I at least tell Him again and again that I love Him; that is not difficult and it keeps alive the fire in my heart. Even though this fire of love might seem extinct I would still throw little straws upon the embers and I am certain it would rekindle.”
In other words, it’s not too late; even in the short hours of the Fourth Week of Advent!
This time of year we begin to hear the phrase “New Year’s Resolutions.” A good friend of mine introduced me to the phrase, “New Day’s Resolution.” In that phrase I think there is a lesson if your Advent Journey has been like mine. It’s not how you start, it is how you finish. The Lord’s mercies are new every morning and he offers us a fresh start! We can pray that prayer, in keeping with the Little Flower, “Lord, make up for what I have done poorly (whether actual or perceived), and bring about an even greater good.” The desire for and awareness of the need for grace during your Advent Journey is in itself evidence that the Lord is at work.
You may have found yourself like me, like Charlie Brown, wrestling with anxiety, loneliness, thoughts of not doing Advent “good enough” … But, the Lord offers us this invitation and reminder.
It is not how you start! It is how you finish! Those feelings that perhaps you have wrestled with this season (as so many often do), perhaps those can be offered up, and united to his own! Suffering is a great preparation for the coming of Christ! Because we know that he himself has born our grief; he endured the Cross for the joy that is set before him! So, to can we.
“Lord, Jesus Christ, in your infinite mercy and compassion, hear my prayer. Lord, I surrender every bit of my worry, of my fear, of my doubt to you. I offer it up to you! I unite with your own suffering. Lord, help me to see the work you are doing in my heart even though I may be unaware. Help me to understand the ways you are preparing me to receive you. Help me to be more aware of the ways in which you come into my life every day, and every moment of the day. Lord, help me to know with confidence, that your love and mercy are new every morning and that you are well able to redeem all things. Lord, Jesus, help me to prepare the manger of my heart for you; that I may receive you at Christmas, and every day. Lord, open my heart to your grace this Advent! Come, Holy Spirit! Lord, your will be done in my heart, in my home, in my relationships, in my life.”