In the Name of Jesus
The Call to Lead with Love
“The world says, ‘Prove that you are important.’ Jesus says, ‘Be who you are: a beloved child of God.’”
—Henri Nouwen, In the Name of Jesus
Introduction: The Temptation of Power and the Invitation to Love
In the trenches of parish life, leadership can feel like an unending uphill climb. We strive to keep ministries afloat, inspire tired volunteers, launch programs, and maintain morale. But in this well-meaning hustle, many of us—pastors, staff, volunteers—begin to feel hollow, burned out, or disconnected from the joy that once animated our call.
We are not alone in this.
Henri Nouwen, once a renowned professor at Harvard and Yale, left the academic elite to serve in a L’Arche community with men and women with intellectual disabilities. In doing so, he underwent a radical transformation. “I had always considered myself a person who could give something to others,” he wrote. “It had never occurred to me that receiving was also important.”
His book In the Name of Jesus is a clarion call to a different kind of leadership—one rooted not in the need to be relevant, spectacular, or powerful, but in the vulnerability of being led by Christ.
If you’ve read my earlier reflections on Why “Motivating” People in Ministry Doesn’t Work and Why People Serve: Creating a Ministry Culture That Lasts, then this article is the natural next step: it is about rediscovering the heart of parish leadership—not through strategies or hype, but through love, relationship, and faithfulness.
From Relevance to Prayer: “Are You in Love with Jesus?”
“The question is not: How many people take you seriously? Can you show some results? But: Are you in love with Jesus?”
—Henri Nouwen
One of the greatest temptations in parish ministry and leadership is to measure our worth by relevance. It hides behind noble goals—reaching people, growing attendance, revitalizing a ministry—but it can very often subtly turn our gaze inward: Am I doing enough? Am I being effective? Are they impressed? Or, it can shift our focus to things that are of secondary importance: How many people are in the pews? How many volunteers signed up? What programs are thriving? Numbers and perceived performance can become subtle idols that lead us to value the image of productivity over the reality of people and the need for authentic transformation.
Nouwen reminds us that the core of Christian leadership is contemplative prayer. “The central question is whether the future ministers are truly men and women of God,” he says. “People who do not depend on their own success, talents, or power but are deeply in love with Jesus.”
If we look at the example of Jesus, he never sought popularity or human recognition. After healing the sick and feeding the multitudes, He withdrew to pray (Luke 5:26). He did not build His mission around attracting crowds but around transforming hearts.
The painful reality that we have to face is that a parish can have a well-oiled system of programs but lack true discipleship. Nouwen warns against becoming overly focused on administration rather than transformation. Jesus did not build an organization in His earthly ministry; He formed disciples who carried His mission forward. He spent three years deeply investing in a small group of people to evangelize the world.
Practical Guidance for Parish Life:
Schedule prayer time before scheduling meetings. Let intimacy with Jesus shape your decisions.
Teach staff and volunteers to measure fruit not by numbers, but by fidelity to the Gospel.
Create sacred spaces—literally and figuratively—where your team can encounter Christ.
Measure success by faithfulness, not numbers. Ask: Are people growing in holiness? Are we loving those God has placed before us?
Create a culture where personal encounter with Christ is the priority in all things. Encourage staff and volunteers to see their work as mission, not obligation.
From Popularity to Ministry: From Hero to Servant
“Ministry is not an individual hero’s story but a communal witness.”
—Henri Nouwen
Parish leaders often feel pressure to be “the one.” The indispensable person. The hero. This pressure is deadly. Not only is it unsustainable, but once again, it does not seem to model Christ’s example very closely.
Jesus refused the temptation of spectacle in the desert (Matthew 4). He didn’t build His credibility by impressing crowds but by loving them. Likewise, Nouwen teaches that ministry is not about dazzling others with our gifts. “The Christian leader is called to help people hear the gentle voice of God in the midst of a noisy world.”
When we obsess over how our work in ministry is perceived, or whether we are liked or accepted, or the backlash that may come if we pursue a needed change, we block the beautiful movement of God’s grace. I once worked with an understaffed parish and, when I asked what the parish was doing in terms of evangelization and outreach, the response was that they were polling the surrounding community to get a sense of how the parish was perceived by the public before doing any evangelization. Imagine if the Apostles had done that at Pentecost! They’d still be waiting in that Upper Room. No doubt, there were people in the parish already who would have loved the opportunity to evangelize, if it was presented to them – and likely with little concern for the poll results.
Practical Guidance:
Stop trying to be impressive. Be present.
Name and affirm the gifts of others—especially those who serve behind the scenes.
Encourage team members to work from identity, not insecurity.
Build a culture of trust. Avoid micromanaging; instead, form and equip others to utilize their gifts for the sake of mission.
Encourage open communication. Allow parishioners to voice concerns without fear; and do your best not to take it personally when some may disagree.
Prioritize people over programs. Volunteers and staff should feel valued as individuals, not just as “workers.”
Invest in mentorship. Both a mentor of your own as well as mentoring others in your parish.
Move beyond events to transformation. Every ministry should focus on forming disciples, not just filling calendars.
From Leading to Being Led: The Power of Vulnerability
“The way of the Christian leader is not the way of upward mobility but the way of downward mobility.”
—Henri Nouwen
Jesus told Peter, “When you were younger, you fastened your own belt and went where you wanted… but when you grow old, you will stretch out your hands and be lead where you do not want to go” (John 21:18). Leadership is not about gaining control—it’s about learning to surrender.
This surrender is terrifying. But it’s holy and necessary.
In L’Arche, Nouwen discovered that the greatest gift he had to offer wasn’t his intellect, resume, or eloquence. It was his vulnerable self. “We are not the healers… We are sinful, broken, vulnerable people who need as much care as anyone we care for.”
In parish life, leaders must be willing to be led—by Christ, by community, and even by those they serve. This is the crucified path of leadership.
Practical Guidance:
Don’t hide your struggles—let others see your humanity. There is something to be said for the fact that Jesus’ followers saw him weep, grow tired, bleed and die on the Cross. He made no effort to disguise His suffering. All the more reason we can unite our sufferings to His.
Ask for help. Let others carry part of the burden. Even Jesus had Simon of Cyrene.
Trust your team. Empower them not just with tasks, but with trust. Enter Peter and the rest of the Apostles.
From the Catechism:
“Christ's kingship is shown above all in the humble service of his life and death.” (CCC 786)
From Programs to Discipleship: Investing in People More Than Performance
“The mystery of ministry is that we have been chosen to make our own limited and very conditional love the gateway for the unlimited and unconditional love of God.”
—Henri Nouwen
Too many parishes are teeming with activity but starved for encounter.
It’s easy to fall into administrative overload, churning out events and programs with little time for the slow, relational work of disciple-making. But Jesus didn’t build systems—He built people.
And that’s our call too.
Practical Guidance:
Personally mentor one or two parishioners into deeper discipleship.
Discern what ministries are bearing real fruit—and have the courage to prune the rest.
Invest in spiritual formation opportunities for your team.
From Performance to Belovedness: Living from the Father’s Love
“The leaders of the future will be those who dare to claim their irrelevance in the contemporary world as a divine vocation.”
—Henri Nouwen
This is the linchpin of Nouwen’s message—and the Gospel.
You are not the sum of your parish’s success. You are not your title or your accomplishments. You are not your failures or your burnout. You are a beloved son or daughter of God.
Parish leaders who know they are loved—truly loved—lead differently. They serve from fullness, not fear. They sacrifice without resentment. They remain faithful even when fruit is invisible.
You do not need to be spectacular. You just need to be faithful.
“The central question is not ‘What can we do?’ but ‘Who are we called to be?’” –Nouwen
Conclusion: Leading in the Name of Jesus
“Christian leadership must be rooted in the permanent, intimate relationship with the incarnate Word, Jesus.”
—Henri Nouwen
The renewal of the Church will not come from better strategies. It will come from deeper holiness. From men and women who lead not with ego, but with Eucharist. Who carry towels instead of titles. Who sit with Jesus before speaking for Him. Who dare to become irrelevant in the world’s eyes so they might become radiant in God’s.
You were never meant to do this alone. Jesus is with you. The saints are cheering you on. And your small, hidden acts of love are more powerful than you know.
Let us lead in the name of Jesus—with trust, sacrifice, and love.
For Reflection and Prayer
Share this post with someone in ministry you care about. Set aside 10 minutes this week to pray with one of these Scripture passages together (even if remote).
Scripture for Meditation:
John 21:15-19 – “Do you love me?”
Matthew 4:1-11 – Jesus’ temptations
John 13:12-17 – Washing of feet
Philippians 2:5-11 – The humility of Christ
Catechism References:
CCC 2567 – God’s invitation to prayer
CCC 786 – Christ’s kingship expressed in service
CCC 2447 – Service to the poor and vulnerable
CCC 875, 918 – Servant nature of ministry