You're not alone! Who is your Simon of Cyrene?
Have you ever experienced self doubt, burnout, or pressure to succeed in your work? Who takes up the cross with you, like Simon did for Jesus?
When I first started working in ministry several years ago, I felt… insufficient. I was hired to oversee and consult parishes on ministry efforts with just 2 years of experience and no related degree. I thought to myself... out of all the applicants, why on earth did they hire me?! I was underqualified. In that, I felt like there was pressure on my shoulders to prove myself. (Almost as if the salvation of the youth in the diocese rested on my shoulders and mine alone… yea right!) It led to stress, fast-approaching burnout, poor spiritual growth, and continued self-doubt.
Have you ever experienced this feeling within ministry or another area of work?--self doubt, burnout, or pressure to succeed in every area?
Why is this the natural tendency in ministry? It is so easy to feel pressure to justify our work. It’s common to want to see immediate fruit from our efforts or expect transformations of the heart and soul to be too numerous to measure–It’s wonderful if that transformation happens… but guess what! It is NOT on you to make it happen! I wish I knew this earlier in my work.
It is so easy to feel alone in this pressure in ministry work! But why?! This is the opposite of what ministry should be, which is community, support, relationships, authenticity, and trust in God’s goodness. However, when a youth night goes poorly or students don’t pay attention, “it's our fault.” If a parent is angry, “it's our fault.” If a kid just can't seem to fall in love with Jesus like we love him, “it's our fault.” Of course, it isn’t actually our fault, but this is the pressure so many in ministry place on themselves…
I can't be alone in this tendency, but why is this our default while asking for help or admitting our struggles is so difficult!? Here’s the irony… receiving help is clearly the biblical example set by Jesus!
(Are you ready to get nerdy with Scripture with me?!)
In the Gospel of Mark’s passage of the “Rich young man,” He asks what more he must do for eternal life, and Jesus’ response is to give away all he has and follow Him (10:21). Again, in Matthew, chapter 16, Jesus says to his disciples, “If any man would come after me, let him deny himself and take up his cross and follow me” (16:24). There’s a theme in Jesus’ calling to be his disciples (which is what we are all aiming to be)! He asks all of us to follow him, which also means taking up the cross!
So, think of the passages where Christ does both. In the moment he is preparing to follow the will of the Father, in his humanity, he experiences agony while in Gethsemane.1 He experiences pain, sorrow, and perhaps fear of what is about to take place–so much so that he asks the Father to let the cup, which he is to drink in the crucifixion, to pass. I relate a great deal to this! How often do we find ourselves in feelings of loneliness, hurt, anxiety, pain, stress, pressure, you name it–and desire all of it to cease! Or perhaps we quietly endure it without asking for help, often from the one person who wants to help us most–Christ! We can learn a great deal from Jesus’ response while experiencing human emotions and struggles; he runs to the Father! And through it all, he still desires the will of the Father.
Looking at the next example of Jesus in the passage where he physically “takes up the cross” while someone “follows him.” When he carries his cross, with the weight of every soul on his shoulders, does he do it alone? It’s important to realize that He could have!!! In his divinity, He could have willed all divine power and the strength of God to pick up the cross and walk the rest of the way to his death without a single drop of sweat or struggle.
In his humanity, however, he shows all of us we need help, because in our humanity we can’t grow in holiness and sanctity alone! We can’t be his disciples alone! And that is okay!!! It's good in fact, because Jesus shows us it is good. Jesus, did not need help, and yet Simon of Cyrene is the only one in all of Scripture who does exactly what Jesus asks of his disciples; He took up Jesus’ same cross and followed behind him. Jesus needed help, and so do we!
I thank the Lord every day for those who support me at work and in the home. It wasn’t until I embraced the Simon of Cyrenes in my life that I felt like I could actually follow the will of God, even when it required taking up crosses!
So I want to challenge you! With courage, do not brave the storm alone! Be brave enough to ask for help, from others and from God.
Here are a few tips:
Surround yourself with a community that supports you. That will carry a cross with you.
Don’t be discouraged if you fall or lose passion. As St. Ignatius advises, never make a life change in the midst of desolation. Take it to prayer.
Have a prayer team or prayer partner. If we are disciples of God, we need to be shrouded in prayer.
Be Simon of Cyrene to others! We aren’t in battle with one another. We are at battle, yes! But it's one God has already won for us... so help one another be on the winning side by building each other up!
While you are building up others through support and prayer, try to build people in formation and ministry. Sometimes the reality is that we do things on our own because there are no volunteers or people formed to carry the cross with us. So, invest in people in ministry so they can become future leaders in ministry!
Finally, our “help comes from the Lord, maker of heaven and earth” ... so run to him in everything! Pray to him with everything!
You are not alone in ministry! And don’t think you have to be!
Reflect and comment: Who is your Simon of Cyrene?
Mt 26: 37-39